Cruciformity

After just writing about not seeking victory ‘according to the flesh’, I hope that it’s not hypocritical of me to shout out a big COME ON YOU SPURS! There have been 9 years of humiliation and embarrassment and scorn from the fans of our bitter North London rivals - Arsenal. Over time our home ground, White Heart Lane, was dubbed by Gunners fans as “3-point lane”. However, there was a different song being sung at the Lane last night as we put 5 goals past a strong Arsenal side! What’s more it sends us into the final of the Carling Cup against Chelsea at Wembley Stadium. I’ve watched some of the footage andat 4-1 the whole crowd is belting out: Que Sara, Sara; whatever will be will be; we’re going to WEMB-ER-LEE; Que Sara. Sara… and in the dying minute of the game, Malbranque slots in one last goal and the fans went mental and WHL practically starts melting because of the energy produced.

Admittedly is only the third rate Carling Cup, but a victory is a victory. And there is no sweeter smelling victory than against Arsenal. With Arsenal twelve places ahead of us in the Premiership, I’m sure this boasting will be short-lived so I thought I’d get in while I could. COYS!

On Thursday night at White Hart Lane Martin Jol was told just before the UEFA Cup match that it would be his last match as Coach at Spurs.

I suppose that for most of you this means even less than the tragic news that Paris Hilton cancelled recent plans to go to Rwanda (sorry to have to break that to you). For most Spurs fans this means devastation.

Here’s my slight over-representation of a football tragic’s feelings…

BMJ (Big Martin Jol) was a father-figure to Spurs fans who have endured some terrible football from their club over the last twenty years. When Jol stepped up to take on the big job, and when he brought us into 5th position in the League two years running and brought European football back to the Lane, he was quickly adopted as one of Tottenham’s favourite sons. It was only a couple of months ago that things looked so good. We injected 40 million pounds into getting new players! But… a string of bad luck and injuries to our back line has resulted in our 18th position on the ladder and the board’s lack of a scape-goat.

There have been tears, don’t worry about that. Lots of anger. But also the pledge of fans to never stop supporting the club. Admittedly, I’ve only ever really been keeping scores from websites and rarely seeing games on Fox. But BMJ was like the Godfather - the man you looked to when times got tough -  Spurs would have a few defeats, and the Dutchman would take it, say the hard truth, speak of his hopes and then shape the side into a ‘winning mentality’.

Martin made an emotion-packed statement following the game on the official website:

I can understand the position of the Club in light of the results. I have thoroughly enjoyed my time here. Tottenham Hotspur is a special Club and I want to thank the terrific staff and players. For me the fans were always amazing with their support so I would also like to say thank you – I shall never forget them.

The fans turned up to the game unaware of the message that the board had just stabbed into the square of Martin’s back. So one fan at the game writes of the event as it unfolded on the night:

The sound of beeping mobiles in the interval alerted us to the biggest drama of the night. News filtered around the stadium that Jol had agreed a severance package with Sevilla boss Juande Ramos stepping in to the breach.

Text ’severance’ then turned to text ’sacked’ and the crowd rose as one to voice their admiration for the affable Dutchman.

He wasn’t perfect, but he bagged us two top-five finishes in a row and a stirring Uefa Cup run last season that was halted by a shocking refereeing decision, ironically against Sevilla.

With the sound of ‘I love Martin Jol, Martin Jol loves me. I love Martin Jol, Martin Jol loves me’ ringing around the stadium, the big man waved goodbye to a once proud club.

I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. It is right for me to feel this way about all of you, since I have you in my heart; for whether I am in chains or defending and confirming the gospel, all of you share in God’s grace with me. God can testify how I long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus. (Phil. 1:3-8, NIV)

It’s almost embarrassing to read how open Paul is as he expresses his feelings to the Philippians in the opening of his letter to them. He really loves them, and it so joyful in the knowledge that they are partners with him in the gospel and share with him in God’s grace.

I’ve just spent some time on holidays back in Canberra and have been struck with how utterly refreshing it’s been to see my precious friends and family. Like Paul and the Philippians, I had great moments of expressing this kind of joy to others and others expressing it to me. Some of the people I haven’t seen or spoken to for a few months, but then others it’s been a number of years. It sounds all a little bit over-sentimental, doesn’t it? Well, bear with me while I describe some of what happened…

I was involved in a group called Boys Brigade in the mid-nineties and, although not large group of people, the men that lead this group are spectacular servants of Christ and are still leading this group! They’re like parents to me and it was wonderful to talk to Mike and Bela about their joy in growing young lads in the knowledge of Christ.

It was great as well, to get back to St Matts and see my many dear friends there. There were some going strongly, and others struggling. But in both cases, it was great to share our experiences and to reflect on our hope in Christ. I had to bear the brunt of way too much coffee, but I absolutely loved these conversations - they really meant a lot to me.

I also went to Focal Point, the mid-year conference for the FOCUS, the Christian group I was involved in at uni. Here, I saw some good friends and and (characteristically, at this conference) looked deeply into God’s word. It was a real joy to rejoice with others in the gift of God’s Spirit living in us.

Also, although we hang out almost every day at College, Dan and I hit the town in Canberra and shared a memorable night together. I also spent time in Melbourne with Steve, a mate from St Matt’s. The weather was dismal, but it meant that we spent a lot of reflecting on questions of faith, and encouraging each other in various aspects of life.

I’m disappointed because there were others that I didn’t have time to see and spend time with. Two weeks rest isn’t enough, I want more!!

Is it right for me to feel this way and to express this? I think so. Like Paul, I have these people in my heart. As Paul says, this feeling is only right as it is the same as that of Christ Jesus. These people have raised me and loved me, they have nurtured me in ministry and born the fruit of my service among them. In the times when I pressed, I know their love and support of me; their partnership in the gospel. One day we’ll be brought to be in his rest together with all of those in Christ. I look forward to seeing my precious friends and family all together with our Lord Jesus!

It’s a rainy night here in Newtown and I was wondering what to do after a long week. I couldn’t bare to do Hebrew or spend another lonely night in my cell. I couldn’t do people either. After chit-chatting with Des across the corrodor for a little while about nothing that I can remember, I decided grab a coffee and reflect a little on some of the things that have been happening… I’ve recently been overwhelmed with thoughts and I just need to ’shake off some mental lint’ (thanks for the phrase ans!).

There have been a number of deaths that my church and college friends have experienced, and there are some other genuinely difficult times being felt by friends at the moment. This has produced in me increasing sorrow. It hasn’t affected me accutely, but a dull soreness is accumulating.

I’ve been thinking about the nature of relationships, systems (Friedman), differentiation and identity, and the problems of reconciliation (Volf), the nature of theology and centrality of Christ (Barth). This has been exciting but again overwhelming as I realise how much I don’t know and just how complicated things are.

In doctrine we’ve been contemplating the character of God; the trinity and the nature of his goodness, wisdom and power. Would we be obliged to obey Satan if he was the one who created us?

I’ve been humbled with the complications of preparing a short talk on John 3:16…

… and I’ve been slowed chewed and then swallowed up by Hebrew.

I don’t mean to sound depressed, though, I’ve also been greatly overwhelmed with the maturity and the godliness of some of my new-found brothers and sisters here in Sydney. I’ve been greatly encouraged and challenged and am most thankful to God for them.

I don’t know if writing about it has really helped me to bring things together at all. I guess I’m understanding some of the extent of my weakness. It’s greatly comforting to know that while I don’t understand, that God does.

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8 We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair…” 2 Cor 4:7-8

My good friend James took me out watch the Swans play the Dons last night at the MCG and I was reminded about how beautiful that game really is…

To set the scene, Sydney and Essendon were in similar form; both had 5 wins from 9, both had won their two games and were enjoying a fit of healthy players. Essendon’s season last season was crippled by injuries and so it was good to see that they could make a contest of it. In fact, they made a great contest of it. The teams were neck and neck throughout, 27000 fans were on their feet (that is, those that still could stand after some heavy drinking), and the difference came in two kicks: one from Essendon that somehow went in, and one from Sydney that somehow hit the post. The siren went after some flurried football and some worked up watchers-on; Essendon by one point… See the bombers fly up, up…

Let me tell you about one of the delights of morning tea time. Occasionally, Dan and I take a brisk walk down Campbell St to a place called *Campos*. This place makes coffee that belongs in a category of its own - it makes a man want and sing and dance, laugh and cry all at the same time.

You might think that I’m overreacting but just wait until you try it, then you’ll know… alright, I might be overreacting a little bit, but I just had another Campos experience where darkness, gloominess and drudgery, were exchanged for glorious light. Almost sounds religious, doesn’t it? You might be thinking that I need to tone things down a little bit, well maybe YOU just need to go and get a coffee from Campos!

OK, I’ll finish there, enough said.